Life Is Made of Constant Choice-Makings.

So She Said No at the Age of 27.

What choice did you make today? From something as daily as how eggs should be cooked for breakfast to something potentially life-changing as proposing to your date, or saying yes or no to the proposal.

Some choices come easy, but with some, we have to be really pushed to go for it.

From what I’ve observed, it’s easier to make a choice that’s backed by social norms or expectations; such as keeping a stable job or marriage, even if the job or marriage is no longer working or serving my soul.

For me, with that easier choice, came the risk of ignoring my own truth. And once a lie is made to my heart, another one is just a step away: it can become a habit. Before I know it, there is a pile of lies layered on top of my truth, and digging through it becomes that much more troublesome and painful. 

So, the question is, at which point, if ever, do I course correct? “Never too late” is the answer I gathered from Yoshiko Munehiro’s story.

She was 27 when she broke up with her fiancé. 

They were engaged but things weren’t moving forward as he couldn’t make up his mind for a long time. His indecisiveness, she attributed to his working environment. “He worked in a hospital and was always surrounded by women, you see?”

He was never sure if she was the one, and even dared to say “I wonder if there is someone better.”  After trying to convince him in vain three times, she decided that was it and left. 

He regretted. Even his sister came, trying to talk her into changing her mind. What they didn’t know was that Yoshiko was one of the most stubborn people I knew. Her mind was set, and she said goodbye to the life she thought they were building together.

As if that wasn’t big enough of a decision, she then left the weaving studio she was working for, and moved to Nagano to become an independent weaver. I can only guess the reason now.

Yoshiko Munehiro was 30 and thought that she might spend the rest of her life single. 30 at that time was considered late for marriage. Then she met Takeshi Yoshizawa. He who already had three children with his passed wife had the guts to propose to her. Despite all the odds, they fell in love and… here I am.

She never spoke about it much, except for one time. And this is the record from the time.

I realise how brave she had to be: to say No when she was 27 and Yes at the age 30. Consciously or instinctively, she knew her worth and chose to be herself than being degraded into someone she didn’t deserve to be.

Was she happy about the choice she made?

“I am the happiest now, so much so that I don’t mind dying tomorrow” was her usual saying in her last years.

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